Twiggy & Sleepovers

So the picture up above is me around the age of 7 or 8 bout to head to the Christmas Program at church to say the speech that I practiced oh so hard and long for. The rest of the post will be about me in the 7th grade...*blank face*...nothing to do with the picture up above...but this was the only picture that I could find on the web that gave you a sense of my youth. In case you are trying to imagine what I look like in the 7th grade for the remainder of the post, just look at the picture up above, color me in a tad bit browner (just a tad), add a couple inches of height, scratch the dress, and grow my hair out and you have the 12-year-old Twiggy. Any questions???....oook...let's go.

My friends and I happen to randomly talk about our childhoods around lunch time (I don't know what it is...it's like the word "lunch" cues childhood memories). But ANYwhooo, somehow, it got on the subject of sleepovers. I use to be a big fan of sleepovers as a child because I wanted to show my childhood friends that I had a fun house with a cool a$$ mom. A show-off if I must say (luckily, that characteristic has deteriorated but I like to say that I show-off modestly these days). If you are unaware, getting a group of girls together (regardless of age), may result in abandoned friendships, injuries, or whatever else you want to choose from the list. I have been a cute tomboy since I got to pick out my own clothes, so those things that most girls get upset over didn't quite occur with me. The first time I can remember being mad at some chicks at a sleepover was because they were cheating while we were playing "Red Light Green Light" (I believe in winning fair and square and if you have to cheat to surpass me, you ain't nuthin' but a SUCKA!) Besides all of that nonsense, my sleepovers have been in the clear......

UNTIL....

I had a sleepover with 2 of my girl friends in the 7th grade. This was the smallest sleepover I have had in my life and turned out to be the worst....ain't that a biznitch! I will NOT put out the names of these individuals because I have realized that even events that happened years ago still affect the soul....and um...I don't want anyone's soul to be affected. So for the sake of hearts, I will call the individuals 'Tee and Jee' throughout the post. Tee is skinny and Jee is fat.

This story is not long, and I will get straight to the point. What is crazy is that only ONE of these chicks ruined the sleepover and caused me to permanently delete sleepovers from my list of "joy". Jee is the cause. (GOT DAMMIT JEE! I probably could have gotten a couple more years of sleepovers in! I just realized that.) ANYwhooo...me, Tee, & Jee were having a grand ol' time doing our sleepover things....trading Pokemon cards, playing streetball, and even got some Barbie time in. Midnight hit and we had made it to the TV to watch those scary movies that you look at now to be a disgrace...but back then they gave you the creeps. Me and Tee were sitting in the TV room frightened from a scene in the movie when I realized that Jee had been missing for quite awhile. Me and Tee searched the house and found Jee knocked out on the floor in my room. Me and Tee laugh instantly...ready to crash her face with the historic toothpaste prank...but we decide to let her get good and sleep before we execute the plan....so we go for snacks. Joyfully, I open the cabinet and look for all of the goodies that my mama had bought for us....Hmm....couldn't find them. I search the other cabinet...2 bags of chips. Next stop...the fridge...2 juices!! Where are my muthasuckin' snacks at?! We had way more than this! Then I hear Tee say quietly, "umm....Jhonna....check out the trash." Can you BELIIEEVVVEE that in the trash can there were tons of chip and candy bar wrappers and juice boxes EMPTY?!" Me and Tee look at each other and instantly run back up to my room to search Jee for evidence. Lo and behold, there by Jee's hand was a half-eaten bag of Doritos. WTF!!!! This fat a$$ seriously ate up all my snacks!!!....These snacks were for 3 people and she smashed a good 85% of it!! I was through. I woke Jee up and told her that both her and Tee had to get the hell up outta here in the morning.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Twiggy Don't Fux Wit' Fat A$$es at Sleepovers

STANK Is No Good In A Learning Atmosphere #fact

This is my little niece Tamera....4 years of age. I love her....just as goofy as I am...(just in a smaller body). My oldest sister/ her mama called me last night to tell me that Tamera had gotten in trouble at school. My 1st reaction was 'O LAWD' because my sister is "that one parent" who tries to take any situation her kids are involved in to court. So I was waiting for there to be a big uproar. Well....that actually wasn't the case this time. According to my sister, (after a long "conference" with the teacher) Tamera deserved her punishment....which was a timeout in the corner *sad face*. I'm sure you all wanna know what she did (If u don't, F-U & keep reading anyway)...She simply kept changing seats because she did not want to sit by the stank kid in the class....The teacher kept telling her to sit still but she wouldn't. Ok...if I was the teacher, this would not be a big deal!!! I would simply help Tamera find a comfortable place (assigned seats ain't ISH by the way). I have been in Tamera's position before...1st grade....got in trouble for not wanting to sit by the "boy who smelled like pee". So I know her pain!! It's not a good thing to have to endure such STANK! All she wanted to do was find a comfortable seat/area so she could simply learn her lessons for the day *innocent face*.

Ok so maybe i am playing the "over-protective" role as the aunt, but #imjustsayin (<--Twitter lingo). Teachers should be aware of the stank kids in the classroom. And they can't tell me that they don't know who they are. If a 4-year-old notices a foul aroma, I know the grown person in charge will. It's time to take a stand teachers!! You have 4-year-olds who are hinting to you that they are in pain & suffering! Do you want this to distract them from their studies so they can turn into deadbeats and crack hoes when they get older because YOU didn't allow them to get comfortable and move away from the smelly distraction!?! Contact the stank kids' parents and let them know the deal. If you see that the stank kids' parents are stank too....offer them a business card to the nearest therapy counseling in the area....because this is TRULY a problem!!

Let's all take a stand and promote good hygiene!!!

Clean Classrooms = Productive Learning

Lacefronts fo LIFE!

This is my friend SuJo. She has been rockin lacefront wigs since the tender age of 4 months.

FUX WIT HER!!!

Only I remember?

Maybe it's cuz I'm an adult but I really can't watch Sesame Street anymore without laughing at these current celebrities. . .

LOOK AT PATTI HIT THAT FG lmao

And check out Elmo's run at the end lol

My Goon Plies

So Plies was performing at FAMU recently and when he looked in the crowd, he saw an itty bitty woman with kiddie clothes on. Turns out....it was a 12-year-girl!! He pulls the girl on stage and says "I will give you $1000.....but you gotta go home." Apparently, Plies didn't think it was appropriate for the youngin' to be at his uncensored show.

Don't believe me??....check it out:



I am so proud of Plies!!! Bravo young man...BRAVO!

This Isn't A Baby...She's really 26

Look at this baby dancing to Stanky Leg. Besides finding humor in the socks she has on, I had to chuckle at the fact that she actually stays on beat for 98% of the video. Check it:

Now Show Out!

Saw this on my boy Will Hump's blog (available HERE). This made my day!!! The Jerk Boys ain't got nuthin on this!!

Vent Session

The news has been CRAAAZY lately! I am already not fond of the news anyway because I gain NO positive insight from it. But if you are a web browser, you can't help but get a glimpse of the heavy material that the news publishes constantly. With that said, I am sure that most of you have heard of the incident that recently occurred in Chicago with a 16-year-old student named Derrion Albert. He was beaten by gangs around his school which lead to his death. POINTLESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Was there any type of positive consequence from killing this innocent kid? NOPE!! In my opinion, gangs have never had a reason to exist. It portrays individuals who are scared to fight their own battles (if a fight is even necessary). I have no remorse for individuals that were purposely involved in this. Not even in this fight...but in other ones. Time to get a new outlook buddy. The one you got is garbage.

But on another note, I am SURE You heard about the bus fight at Belleville West high school that actually made national news because SUPPOSEDLY this fight was the result of a hate crime (doubt that). This fight was truly a shame, but there are way worst events going on around the country (such as the Derrion Albert incident) and for this to make the news is crazy. There were CRAZY fights when I was in high school but none of them hit the press like this. I just think it's time for everyone to get their priorities together. Hopefully, my little opinion matters...especially to all you "gang-bangers" that read MadeMonarchs.com . (hehe)

TAKE IT IN STRIDE AND LET THE LORD BE YOUR GUIDE!! :)

Mini Fashion

Babies can have style too!!..thanks to Pre-K Apparel. This brand brings streetwear to the infant/toddler world. I hope this brand is still alive by the time I have a baby..(in about another 10 years). Check out more styles at their site HERE! (select fits on Karmaloop.)

By the way....I am greatly saddened at the fact that I forgot to give a birthday shout-out to my baby nephew Koby on the blog! He turned 1-year-old on September 20th. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KOBY JAMES!! I'ma have to get him some of this Pre-K gear. (And I hope this post is still alive by the time he is able to read so he can see this for his self and appreciate it. But for now...his mommy can)

Small Divas

So if you don't watch Tiny and Toya on BET, then you wouldn't know that Tiny has started a little 4-person girl group with her daughter Zonnique, Toya's daughter (and Lil Wayne's) Reginae, and friends. Is it just me or are girl groups not cute anymore?.....*long pause*.....it's just dead to me. Sad to see but yea.....Or maybe it IS just me!....Or I'm just old?...and I don't watch 106 & Park...because that is probably the main place you will see them. But ANYwhooo...it's still kinda cute I guess....The attempt.

Tiny and her daughter Zonnique

Toya with Reginae .... (I want them to take that BS out her hair. Please and thanks.)

BAFOONERY!

The Saga Continues??...mixtapes dropping???....WTF?!

Diddy gettin one off on his "mini-me" and the late-great Notorious B.I.G's cute "mini-me". Pay attention to the toothpick.

Little Angel

Pray for them yall... *shakin my head*

Blessed Eyes

I love seeing dope a$$ photography...especially when the models are KIDS!! Check out some pics from the wonderful editorials of Nick & Chloe: