Twiggy & Sleepovers

So the picture up above is me around the age of 7 or 8 bout to head to the Christmas Program at church to say the speech that I practiced oh so hard and long for. The rest of the post will be about me in the 7th grade...*blank face*...nothing to do with the picture up above...but this was the only picture that I could find on the web that gave you a sense of my youth. In case you are trying to imagine what I look like in the 7th grade for the remainder of the post, just look at the picture up above, color me in a tad bit browner (just a tad), add a couple inches of height, scratch the dress, and grow my hair out and you have the 12-year-old Twiggy. Any questions???....oook...let's go.

My friends and I happen to randomly talk about our childhoods around lunch time (I don't know what it is...it's like the word "lunch" cues childhood memories). But ANYwhooo, somehow, it got on the subject of sleepovers. I use to be a big fan of sleepovers as a child because I wanted to show my childhood friends that I had a fun house with a cool a$$ mom. A show-off if I must say (luckily, that characteristic has deteriorated but I like to say that I show-off modestly these days). If you are unaware, getting a group of girls together (regardless of age), may result in abandoned friendships, injuries, or whatever else you want to choose from the list. I have been a cute tomboy since I got to pick out my own clothes, so those things that most girls get upset over didn't quite occur with me. The first time I can remember being mad at some chicks at a sleepover was because they were cheating while we were playing "Red Light Green Light" (I believe in winning fair and square and if you have to cheat to surpass me, you ain't nuthin' but a SUCKA!) Besides all of that nonsense, my sleepovers have been in the clear......

UNTIL....

I had a sleepover with 2 of my girl friends in the 7th grade. This was the smallest sleepover I have had in my life and turned out to be the worst....ain't that a biznitch! I will NOT put out the names of these individuals because I have realized that even events that happened years ago still affect the soul....and um...I don't want anyone's soul to be affected. So for the sake of hearts, I will call the individuals 'Tee and Jee' throughout the post. Tee is skinny and Jee is fat.

This story is not long, and I will get straight to the point. What is crazy is that only ONE of these chicks ruined the sleepover and caused me to permanently delete sleepovers from my list of "joy". Jee is the cause. (GOT DAMMIT JEE! I probably could have gotten a couple more years of sleepovers in! I just realized that.) ANYwhooo...me, Tee, & Jee were having a grand ol' time doing our sleepover things....trading Pokemon cards, playing streetball, and even got some Barbie time in. Midnight hit and we had made it to the TV to watch those scary movies that you look at now to be a disgrace...but back then they gave you the creeps. Me and Tee were sitting in the TV room frightened from a scene in the movie when I realized that Jee had been missing for quite awhile. Me and Tee searched the house and found Jee knocked out on the floor in my room. Me and Tee laugh instantly...ready to crash her face with the historic toothpaste prank...but we decide to let her get good and sleep before we execute the plan....so we go for snacks. Joyfully, I open the cabinet and look for all of the goodies that my mama had bought for us....Hmm....couldn't find them. I search the other cabinet...2 bags of chips. Next stop...the fridge...2 juices!! Where are my muthasuckin' snacks at?! We had way more than this! Then I hear Tee say quietly, "umm....Jhonna....check out the trash." Can you BELIIEEVVVEE that in the trash can there were tons of chip and candy bar wrappers and juice boxes EMPTY?!" Me and Tee look at each other and instantly run back up to my room to search Jee for evidence. Lo and behold, there by Jee's hand was a half-eaten bag of Doritos. WTF!!!! This fat a$$ seriously ate up all my snacks!!!....These snacks were for 3 people and she smashed a good 85% of it!! I was through. I woke Jee up and told her that both her and Tee had to get the hell up outta here in the morning.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Twiggy Don't Fux Wit' Fat A$$es at Sleepovers